The Mets make the Knicks look good

If there’s a book on ‘How to Run a Sports Organization’, baseball’s New York Mets haven’t taken it off the shelf yet. They don’t know how to win games. They sign the wrong players. They can’t get out of the Yankees’ shadow. And they certainly don’t know how to sack their manager. Now they’ve alienated their fans, and take it from me, the last thing you want is an angry New Yorker. If I’m in the Mets front office, I would read that book as soon as I can. Or at least get it on audiotape.
Chapter 1: Win games.
The Mets were doing a fine job of this last year, leading their division by seven games late in the season. But in a Jean Van de Velde-type collapse, they lost 12 of their final 17 games and missed the playoffs. This season, they are off to a 35-36 record, leading to an unorthodox sacking of their manager.
Chapter 2: Sign competent players.
Mo Vaughn was a legend in the mid 1990s. But when the Mets signed him in 2001, he was a 275-pound blob. They paid him $13m his first season, or, in Mo Vaughn terms, 50 million donuts. He never lived up to his ‘hefty’ expectations and lasted only one more year before retiring. This year, they brought in much sought-after pitcher Johan Santana and gave him a 5-year, $150m contract. Is anyone surprised he’s off to a very average 7-5 start?
Interestingly enough, the Mets best player this year has been Ryan Church, who is getting paid in woodchips and lives in obscurity. Unfortunately for the Mets, he’s had two concussions in three months – but they played him anyways. Which brings us to the next chapter:
Chapter 3: Don’t play players with concussions.
Chapter 4: Don’t fire your manager at midnight.
This chapter was almost left out of the book because it has simply never been done. The Mets fired manager Willie Randolph this week at 12:14 in the morning. In a hotel. In Los Angeles. After the Mets had just beat a first-place team. If you’re lost, don’t worry – so is the Mets front office. The Mets had waited too long to fire Randolph, and now they had to wait for the team to hit a losing streak to warrant a sacking. Ever heard of a front office wanting the team to lose? Well, Randolph began winning, but his fate was already sealed. Hence an e-mail to East coast writers at 3:14 a.m. announcing his removal, which arrived too late to be published in the morning papers, throwing the writers into a frenzy. As much as it angered the writers, it did even more to the fans.
Chapter 5: Never, ever, ever upset the fans.
We live in the 21st century. Fans have the ability to blog their opinions on the internet, reaching thousands of readers. In New York, where the Mets get more media coverage than Big Brother 9, everyone is up to date with Mets issues.

This firing was the final straw. The Mets just can’t seem to get anything right. With the Yankees making the playoffs year after year and the Giants winning the Super Bowl last year, the Mets are stuck in neutral, going nowhere fast. The only thing the Mets fans have to look forward to is an $810m stadium that will be finished in 2009. But does a new stadium actually help the fans forget about the past?
For an answer, look no further than Seattle. Has Safeco Field helped Mariners fans forget about the sale of A-Rod, Griffey Jr., and the Big Unit in the course of one year? I think not. And if it did, I apologize.