The Mets make the Knicks look good

If there’s a book on ‘How to Run a Sports Organization’, baseball’s New York Mets haven’t taken it off the shelf yet. They don’t know how to win games. They sign the wrong players. They can’t get out of the Yankees’ shadow. And they certainly don’t know how to sack their manager. Now they’ve alienated their fans, and take it from me, the last thing you want is an angry New Yorker. If I’m in the Mets front office, I would read that book as soon as I can. Or at least get it on audiotape.
Chapter 1: Win games.
The Mets were doing a fine job of this last year, leading their division by seven games late in the season. But in a Jean Van de Velde-type collapse, they lost 12 of their final 17 games and missed the playoffs. This season, they are off to a 35-36 record, leading to an unorthodox sacking of their manager.
Chapter 2: Sign competent players.
Mo Vaughn was a legend in the mid 1990s. But when the Mets signed him in 2001, he was a 275-pound blob. They paid him $13m his first season, or, in Mo Vaughn terms, 50 million donuts. He never lived up to his ‘hefty’ expectations and lasted only one more year before retiring. This year, they brought in much sought-after pitcher Johan Santana and gave him a 5-year, $150m contract. Is anyone surprised he’s off to a very average 7-5 start?
Interestingly enough, the Mets best player this year has been Ryan Church, who is getting paid in woodchips and lives in obscurity. Unfortunately for the Mets, he’s had two concussions in three months – but they played him anyways. Which brings us to the next chapter:
Chapter 3: Don’t play players with concussions.
Chapter 4: Don’t fire your manager at midnight.
This chapter was almost left out of the book because it has simply never been done. The Mets fired manager Willie Randolph this week at 12:14 in the morning. In a hotel. In Los Angeles. After the Mets had just beat a first-place team. If you’re lost, don’t worry – so is the Mets front office. The Mets had waited too long to fire Randolph, and now they had to wait for the team to hit a losing streak to warrant a sacking. Ever heard of a front office wanting the team to lose? Well, Randolph began winning, but his fate was already sealed. Hence an e-mail to East coast writers at 3:14 a.m. announcing his removal, which arrived too late to be published in the morning papers, throwing the writers into a frenzy. As much as it angered the writers, it did even more to the fans.
Chapter 5: Never, ever, ever upset the fans.
We live in the 21st century. Fans have the ability to blog their opinions on the internet, reaching thousands of readers. In New York, where the Mets get more media coverage than Big Brother 9, everyone is up to date with Mets issues.

This firing was the final straw. The Mets just can’t seem to get anything right. With the Yankees making the playoffs year after year and the Giants winning the Super Bowl last year, the Mets are stuck in neutral, going nowhere fast. The only thing the Mets fans have to look forward to is an $810m stadium that will be finished in 2009. But does a new stadium actually help the fans forget about the past?
For an answer, look no further than Seattle. Has Safeco Field helped Mariners fans forget about the sale of A-Rod, Griffey Jr., and the Big Unit in the course of one year? I think not. And if it did, I apologize.

Defending my true love

No, I am not talking about Kristen Wiig. I am talking about soccer. Recently, my friend and former colleague Phillip Barnett made some comments about soccer on his well-written blog that soccer, along with hockey, will "never be widely accepted by Americans". This may be true, but Phil, your reasoning is faulty.

One of your reasons is that soccer "lacks a defining play". You say soccer has goals, but that is not enough. You cite that "football has touchdowns, baseball has homeruns" - so how does soccer not have goals!?!

A goal in can be one of the most beautiful plays in all of sports. The same can't be said about basketball and baseball. In basketball, one of the most famous plays of all time is Jordan's shot against Utah and Bryon Russell that sealed the Bulls 1998 NBA Championship. This is arguably one of the greatest shots in NBA history, and surely Phil, this must be a defining moment in NBA history.



Now, don't get me wrong - it was a great play. It was in Utah, with time winding down - it was a great shot, no doubt. But in all honesty, it looks like shots that are knocked down every single night in the NBA. It wasn't that special of a shot. Any NBA player could make that shot. Hell, I could make that shot. Two dribbles right, push off defender with my left hand, step back, put the ball up, and keep my shooting hand raised up even after the ball goes through the bucket... I've made that shot on my driveway over 100 times!

So shots like that can be called 'defining', but a goal can't? Anyone can make Jordan's most famous shot - but can anyone on the planet do this?



I think not. It would take even the most skillful players in the world hours upon hours of attempts to make that shot. How is that goal not defining?

Let's talk baseball. Phillip's example was the home run. One home run stands out in the mind of all baseball experts - Bobby Thomson's 1951 World Series walk off home run to win the series.



I don't want to take anything away from this play - it is simply one of the most amazing plays in all of sports history. The timing of it, the broadcast of it - it is all perfect.

But here's the thing - it was just a home run. A home run looks the same, no matter who is hitting it. What is really defining about a home run? Well - nothing really. The ball goes over the fence. Hell, I get bored watching a home run derby!

The equivalent of 'The Shot Heard 'Round the World'? How about a goal in extra time during the World Cup - the most-watched sporting event in the world?



Not only was the goal one-in-a-million, but it occurred in extra time on the world's premier sporting stage. Sorry Phil - but I guess I find this goal a little bit more defining than a home run.

Now we pair up soccer against football. This gets a little trickier, because in both sports, scoring is different every time. In football, there are a variety of ways to score. Sure, the 3-yard run up the middle can get old, but what about the 93-yard kickoff returns, or the 18-yard reverese, or even the 9-yard bootleg? Football is much like soccer, in that once the ball gets moving, it depends much on the athlete in how they team scores. The team must work together in perfect cohesion to make sure they achieve their goal.

The thing about football and soccer - no two touchdowns or goals are alike. Some are run-of-the-mill, some are spectacular, but all are unique. I guess this is why this commercial worked so well together:



But HERE is where the difference lies, Phillip....

I am not going to define the word 'define', but I am pretty sure a 'defining play' is a play that can happen only a few times during a game. In fact, the less it happens, the more defining it is when it does happen.

In basketball, you see 15 3-pointers per game. Scratch them off the list.
In baseball, you see anywhere from 0-5 home runs per game, but they all look exactly alike, so it is hard for them to stand out. Scratch them off the list.
In football, touchdowns happen pretty regularly, but touchdowns don't send the crowd into a frenzy. Scratch them off the list.

A goal in soccer possesses all three qualities. If you go 85 minutes without a goal, and suddenly a team scores, isn't that goal the most defining moment of the game? I can't think of anything that is more defining than a goal.

I leave you with one of the greatest goals of all time. In the Champions League Final in 2002, Zidane hit one of the greatest goals in the history of soccer. It was the defining moment in the game, the tournament, his career, and even in the history of soccer.



Phil, I will briefly address your other reasons for soccer not being popularm, 2. the lack of star power and 3. the way the games are filmed.

Lack of star power? Are you kidding me!!! David Beckham is the most recognizable athlete in the world! And if you go around the United States holding up a picture of Lebron James or 'Melo or KG, I bet many Americans would not be able to name them. But you go to France and hold up a picture of Thierry Henry, or go to Italy and hold of a picture of Totti, or Brazil and hold up a picture of Ronaldinho, and I can guarantee a majority of the country could name the player.

Perhaps that is why in Gillette's Mach razor commercials, they picked three of the most popular athletes on the planet and none of them were basketball, football, or baseball players...



And as for the way games are filmed - the only place that sucks is America. In Europe, games have just as many cameras, probably more even, than American football games. In Europe, they constantly show coaches, fans, and bench players, in addition to super close ups of players grimacing after missing a shot or celebrating after making a goal. In fact, every time they score, they are at least 6 replays of the goal every time a goal is scored. The only problem is that in America, there aren't as many cameras, and I think this is purely because of lack of funds.

So, perhaps I may be biased because I have been playing soccer since I was 3. But that doesnt change the fact that i truly believe that a goal isn't just the most defining moment in soccer, but the most defining moment in all of sports.

So Phil, for once, we will have to agree to disagree.

To all you who defended Odom....

A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog entry about Lamar Odom being overrated. Of course, the Laker faithful showed up in full force and defended Odom to the grave. "Look at all the rebounds he gets!" they say. "He's the perfect third man!" they cried.

Well, the day I wrote the article, Odom went off for 26 points (in a loss) against the Jazz. The next game, he scored 22. Lakers fans felt vindicated. Surely, I was wrong, they thought.

Well, Lamar is back to his old self. He's averaging a whopping 9 points and 8 rebounds in the series. He is shooting 0% from 3-point range and hasn't gotten double figures in rebounding once.

Last month, I wrote, "Lamar Odom can't be trusted in the clutch." Nothing is more clutch than the NBA finals, and no one is underachieving more than Lamar Odom.

The Lakers are down 2-1 in this series, and if they have any hope of getting back in this thing, they need Odom to step up. They can't rely on Sasha "the walking shampoo ad" Vujacic to catch fire every single game. But here lies the problem - Odom is in uncharted territory. He has never been on a stage this big before (unless you count the 2004 Summer Olympics, where he averaged 5 points en route to a bronze medal. But let's be honest - that was the worst USA team every assembled. Marbury was the starting PG, so I can't put the US incompetence solely in Odom's hands).

But yet, all the Lakers fans continue to support Odom. Hell, even Boston fans are becoming fans of Odom. Curt Schilling, who knows absolutely nothing about basketball, wrote in his blog that he "became a fan of (Odom) last night". My God, WHY!?!? Is Schilling a huge fan of underachieving professional athletes? Is Adrian Beltre, Larry Hughes, Kyle Boller and Michael Owen on his "favorite athletes list"?

So to all you that defended Odom through these playoffs (where he's averaging below his season averages, by the way), I will not say, "I told you so." But if the Lakers lose this series to the C's, you can't point the finger at Kobe, who's averaging 32-6-6. The finger will be pointed at the supporting cast. And finally, perhaps you'll realize Odom isn't the golden child you all thought he was.

Greetings from London - Thoughts on Oj Mayo

'Ello from London! It's been a while since I've made any posts. Been busy with school and traveling.

Anyways, this whole OJ Mayo thing is going to get ugly. "Allegedly" he accepted gifts from this sports agency so they could secure him as a client when he left to the NBA. I put "allegedly" in quotations because you know he did. He was flat broke before he came here, and now he is the best dresser on the team and owns a 60 in. plasma tv.

Anyways, OJ is going to get off scott-free. He is going to the NBA to make his millions. This leaves USC absolutely fucked. This is a huge deal. This comes in the wake of the Reggie Bush scandal, where similar things happened. It just shows that USC can't control their star athletes.

So anyways, USC is going to get in big trouble. If I am on the NCAA committee, I am kicking the Trojans out of the NCAA for a year. Make them ineligible to compete in the Pac-10 tourney. Take away a couple scholarships. This is the perfect opportunity for them to make a statement about accepting gifts while still in college. Mike Garrett, USC's athletic director, needs to either get fired or make some serious changes.

We all knew Mayo was a headcase before he got to USC. To quote Bill Simmons,

Like it or not, Mayo's style of game resonates with a certain demographic, with his final high school dunk symbolizing the divide between traditional fans and the budding generation that was weaned on Slam Magazine and me-first "superstars" like Stephon Marbury and Vince Carter (neither of whom has played on a 50-win NBA team, by the way). Head over to YouTube and you'll find an unedited clip of the dunk that makes Mayo look like an attention-seeking punk, as well as a heavily edited clip of the same dunk that lionizes it. Is it alarming that a 19-year-old kid throwing himself a halfcourt alley-oop in the final minute of a 40-point win, dunking it, tossing the ball into the stands and getting thrown out of his final high school game, then soaking in a standing ovation could be considered a beautiful moment by some people? Probably not. That's just our culture now. Rappers sing songs with their own names as the chorus. Wannabe celebrities intentionally leak sex tapes to make themselves famous. Rich teenagers make fools of themselves on "My Super Sweet 16" and don't even get that they're the joke.

Tim Floyd needs to start getting some character guys. Something tells me Lil' Romeo and Demar Derozan are not going to be those guys.

As for Mayo - he is scum. He came in as a cocky high school kid who wanted to be the star on a mediocre team. He punched out Daniel Hackett and broke his jaw (which was covered up nicely by the athletic dept). He hogged the ball and turned the ball over. And everyone looked past it. All Trojans were just happy to have him.

He can do whatever he wants. He's OJ Mayo.

And now, when all USC fans stuck with him, he stabbed them in the back. He will be long gone and USC will pay the consequences. Is that right? Absolutely not. Mayo's name should be erased from the record books. Every USC student who has his jersey should burn it. He just completely screwed over a program that was on the rise. Mayo should never return to USC. He should not be welcome.

I'll tell you what - Ben Howland wouldn't stand for that for one second. UCLA's players have showed nothing but class for the last 5 years, while USC has had ill-advised early entry's to the draft and transfers. Sorry Floyd. You're a lovable coach. You show emotion. But you blatantly ignored the problems. You HAD to know something was up. And you ignored it.

I say USC fires Floyd and Garrett. USC's two biggest stars of the decade, and they both got illegal benefits while they were in college.

But hey, at least they were entertaining to watch, right?

Lamar Odom (sucks)

I am sick and tired of hearing about how good Lamar Odom is. Lakers fans LOVE him. People who don't know that much about basketball LOVE HIM EVEN MORE. They think he's an all-star. But he's not. He's never been an all-star. And he'll never be an all-star. A friend of mine said this the other day: "Lamar Odom is to Kobe like Pippen was to Jordan." I almost slapped my friend on the spot. Odom doesn't even come close to Pippen. And I will tell you why.

1. Lamar Odom is having one of his worst statistical year's of his career.
If you don't count his 2001-02 season with the Clippers where he only played in 29 games, he is averaging a career low in points (14.2). He is also below his career average in assists, blocks, free throw %, and 3-point %. He is however, averaging career highs in rebounds and field goal %. But still, it really is a down year for Odom.

2. Lamar Odom can't hit 3's.
Lamar Odom isn't a power forward - he is a small forward. And small forwards have to hit 3's. It's part of the position. Lamar is shooting an abysmal 27% from 3-point range. Luckily for the Lakers, they have enough guys, their other three starters can (Fisher, Bryant, Radmanovic).

3. Lamar Odom can't be trusted in the clutch.
According to Lamar shoots an undesirable 39% in clutch time (teams within 5 points of each other with 5 minutes left). That's definitely not something you want to see. Especially when his free throw shooting is below 70%. Gee, I wonder if teams want to foul Odom?

4. Lamar Odom is inconsistent.
Lamar Odom scored 20+ points nine times this season. Four of those times, he had less than 10 points the next day. So first off, he only gets 20 points once every nine games. For a player that averages 14 ppg, that's kind of odd. Second off, in almost half the games he scores 20 points, he goes cold the very next game. That shows no consistency whatsoever scoring. The only thing that he is consistent at is rebounding. But they have Pau Gasol to do that....so....

5. LAMAR ODOM IS USING 25% OF HIS TALENT!
Lamar Odom has one "WOW" play every game. Every game he takes the ball to the basket in a such an elegant way that he makes it look easy. I compare Odom to Ken Griffey Jr. Griffey had that perfect swing - that swing that looked like he could hit a home run at every at-bat. Odom is the same way. When he drives to the hole, the way his body moves and the way he gets up to the basket.....he looks like a fucking swan.

Why can't he do it every time? He does it with such ease! I don't understand it. He makes these wonderful plays and someone in the room will say, "Man, Odom is so good!" Well, the thing is, he only does that once a game. Odom is operating at 25% of his ability. Sports Illustrated did a player poll a little while ago asking NBA players to say who they think does the least with the most talent. The players answered Vince Carter. Vince Carter? Really? Carter has a career average of 24 ppg and is an 8-time all-star. That seems pretty good to me. Want to see Odom's season points averages? His rookie year, he averaged 16.6. Here's his year-by-year average after that:
17.2
13.1
14.6
17.1
15.2
14.8
15.9
14.2

Oh my God! He's gotten worse! Did Odom hit his peak at 22 years old? He averages 16 per game his rookie year. Everyone thought that was only the beginning. Usually when a rookie averages that much, he gets better. Well, Odom's numbers have gone down. And Odom's numbers never got better. They aren't really bad numbers either. They are just...... average.

And that's what Odom is - average. He never developed. He never grew. He just stayed the same. And it seems like he is satisfied with being the 15 ppg, 9 rbg guy. That's fine. He is a great 3rd guy to have in your top 3. But he's no Pippen. He's no Dumars. He's no McHale. He's Lamar "Average" Odom.

So Lakers fans I tell you this - shut the fuck up.

My love goes on

Last week I professed my love for Kristen Wiig. Here was my favorite sketch from the SNL a couple weeks ago, hosted by Christopher Walken.

As usual, Wiig stole the sketch.

Will Suns and Lakers fans shutup already?

Not even 18 hours after beating the Suns in game 5, the Spurs are already getting blasted for their tactic of fouling Shaq to send him to the free-throw line.

"It's an abomination" cried Mark Heisler of the LA Times. Abomination? Free throw shooting is part of the game! The Suns knew that Shaq was a terrible free-throw shooter when they traded for him. They knew that he had the possibility of being exploited at the free-throw line. And the Spurs, with one of the craftiest and smartest coaches in the league, took advantage of it.

Down big in both game 1 and game 2, the Spurs were able to claw back. Fouling Shaq and sending him to the line worked to keep the Suns high-powered offense at bay. If the Suns were smart, they would pull Shaq out of the game for 2-3 minuted stretches and get some momentum going. Leaving Shaq in the game is a huge liability. And hell, they could have even returned the favor. Duncan is only shooting 61% so far in the playoffs. Put that goon Brian Skinner in the game and make him foul Duncan before he can get a shot off.

Listen up Suns fans - I know you're tired of losing to the Spurs pretty much every single year. And every year, you make excuses for why you lost. (Last year's excuse: "Oh my God if they didnt suspend Stoudemire and Diaw last year we would totally have won...Robert Horry is so cheap he purposely shoved Nash and he should have been suspended for the series...Oh my God that rule where you cant leave the bench is so dumb they should get rid of it...BLAH BLAH BLAH")

Suns fans - you are the most whiny and annoying in the league, but I guess that happens after getting knocked out of the playoffs every single year. And let me give you a LEGITIMATE excuse for you why guys didn't beat the Spurs this year - HOW THE HELL DID YOU NOT FOUL GINOBILI IN GAME ONE!??! YOU FOUL HIM, HE TAKES TWO SHOTS, YOU GUYS ARE STILL UP ONE - GAME OVER!!!!

I think it's time for D'Antoni to go. He's had so many chances. The only thing he's really good at is getting technical fouls.

***EDIT: Only 20 minutes after publishing this post, ESPN reports that D'Antoni will not return to the Suns next year. Apparently Steve Kerr is reading my blog.